I think I found my motivation for now

I am still upset over the BLS incident, how sad is that, that someone can upset me so much over a comment about my weight. I would like to think I could give that lady credit in years to come for me being slimmer than I am today, but i wont.

Yeah she probably did me a favour, she gave me that impetus to start the diet, but the impeturs wasnt her words, it was her facial experession. That look of pity on her face haunts me, that someone can stand and look at me in pity, makes me questin how bad do i look?
we are taught in nursing to always be aware of your face... your expression can say so much more than words can. I will remmeber that expression forever and it has given me a goal, that is to never be like that nurse!

i have a few more tiems to add to mybonus for dieting list too:
to have normal periods again
to feel confident
to enjoy life
to not be that barriatric patient
to be the best at my job
to sort myself out
to have a new life
to get into my older smaller clothes

so anyway my goal is to never have anyone look at me in pity again, odd goal i know but that is what is spurring me on right now, i am hoping as i slim down that my goal will change and weight loss will spur me on.

Well today i have been tidying, i pulled out the computer and cleared all the crap behind it and then moved to the table and cleared that too just need to hoover a bit, sort out the bookcase then i am done! I would like to think that i am doing this because i have more energy and want to get my life organised, as last i am starting to sort out me, this nursing degree i think is much more than a career, i think its all for me. Sounds really selfish, but i have always wanted to be a nurse, and i have always wanted to be slim so here i am starting slimming when i am busy doing other things too, i am getting things that i want for a change now not what others want me to do.
This might not make sense to any reader out there, i tend to find it hard to do two things at once, i was either at work , or slimming and not at work. well this time i find it harder when i am at home, i am finding it easier to stick to it when i am busy and at work/uni. since i am going to be busy for the enxt 2 years i think i might be onto a winner!

so i might print out all my pros to losing weight, the list will contonue to grow i am sure. siging off for now!